Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Drifting...A Rambler's Verse

All the undulating verses bring no shadows to the story inside
I've looked upon the multitude of pages, yet to free myself
From the whims of poetic license to something much more whole
I lost myself upon all those roads where madness became my fate
In spinning those webs, my pen smeared lines of prose and repose
I forgot to sing for the sake of being free, I forgot to sing for me
In the mirrors of the world, I have never found a friend
Rather a fearsome foe bent on tearing out my heart, disposing of my soul
A familiar face caught in timeless glass, yet aged a thousand score or more
I grew up in the time of laughter, when the beaches were clean and warm
Before the man came with his machines and washed away the sounds
Of  Musical Cream Trucks rolling along the shore in the innocent breeze of Sol
Wanting what all little boys want long before they must become battle hardened men
There was a time when I wrote for the joy of seeing lines blur across the canvas of life
I once knew no sad songs, my pen had yet to harvest any blackened notes
Like to tell you that life gave me a handful of lemons, yet I searched out the trees
Picked most of them myself, Whether it was in innocence matters little you see
I carried my heart wherever I traveled on winding, unfamiliar beams
Those I ran into were all too eager to help me hurt myself
In a time of soldiers, I was brashest amongst my friends
One facade of many I would elongate until the end
Inside there was a different cinema playing on broken staircases
Twisted into some fate in search for acceptance and immortal love
Taking whatever form was required to fit the puzzles where I would land
Never enough self assurance, Always searching outside my own fences
Medication became an ally of mine in those days, The serum I would drink
To help me find myself or so I thought, To help me be as bold as I thought you were
Instead I was raped, My solutions stole the very threads of life and existence, Left me bare
I wish I could tell you that I stopped when the winds blew away the pieces of my life
Yet tougher times, called for tougher allies, And I drank the world away
I became angry, I ran as far as I could see, In a gray sky I no longer saw the beach
The doors of those sweet yesterdays had closed and rusted shut
The sea salt or my tears had locked their solid hinges
Gazing at the world were eyes no longer seeing in color
The dreams that kept me going, I would forget before I awoke
Crossing the dunes now, and no longer my medicine kept me well
Looking for a key amongst the shells, though it all blurred to a haze
Much sleeping I did as time permitted, and dreamt in far away lands
I was looking for a solution to someone I could not fight
The war within myself had left me gaunt and pitifully broken
Drifting through sand filled valleys I began to hear a voice
A man who lived amongst the clouds, He had seen my sorrow
Yet this was no ordinary gent, He was omnipotent and grand
He began to comfort me as I told him of all my misfortunes
He seemed to know what I would say, before I could finish my thoughts
There I prayed with him and asked him to save me from my self
He said he would restore my soul, if only I would believe
And that I had to help myself back up, I had to be willing to fight
For the road ahead was not much easier than the one left behind
You see all of us have our own struggles, all our paths familiar
Each person you meet is struggling with life too, and all its tribulations
Be kind to each face you see, You may be all of God they ever know
Love like its never coming back, and if it does, cry and love some more
The roads I walked were Hell, But if not for their pain, I could not be free
I am but a lonely drifter, All I have is honesty, And all I'll ever be is Me

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